The Gospel Is So True I Can´t Even Believe It!

Heal the world, make it a better place... I´m trying and the saga continues!

Mom, I´m super excited for the package! The day after it was too late, it dawned on me that I should have asked for one of those cute little bricks of Velveeta cheese to make scrambled eggs. I was kicking myself all afternoon long saying that that would have been so clever because it doesn´t perish until you open it, but oh well. I thanked Elder Pollock for being a pastor (going home missionary) because that means his family is bringing me a package. I had to explain that you were friends with his mom through missionarymoms.com and it was kind of funny and threw him off at first, but in the end he smiled and said, “that´s what I´m here for.” He´s a good Elder.

To help people quit smoking I suggest that you review Preach My Gospel chapter 10 pages 187-190. That is the approved doctrine for quitting and you are bound to see why. It just makes sense.

Dad, just for the record, I am not afraid that you guys will go inactive, it is just this kind of motto we have developed in the mission. Every time we get together and talk about the work we promise that we will never, ever, ever go inactive, so naturally it spills over into my emails too.

Only in ARGENTINA: the other day we contacted this elderly lady in the street. She was sweeping up leaves and putting them in bags. We offered to help and of course she refused. We chatted with her for a minute and I asked her how old she was… ready for this 96! And she was sweeping her own leaves and bending over and grabbing them and putting them in bags. She REFUSED to let us help her. 96. Wow, when I´m 96 I hope I can still sweep up my own leaves, but I will let the missionaries serve me because I will remember that they have to report their service hours!

The Lord really does detain us and put us where He wants us to be and where we will be safe. For example, we had lunch with the bishop and his wife and after they were chatting away – either unaware, or not concerned by the fact that we are only allowed to be at lunch for an hour. After about an hour and a half I was feeling quite guilty and desperately trying to tactfully get out of there. We finally grabbed a 2 second pause and made our way out. We walked a few blocks and stopped some people on the corner. They were all very upset and it turns out that 5 minutes before this man on a motorcycle had robbed the purse of a woman standing at the corner. Had the bishop not been wisely detaining us with his pictures and stories… we might have been on that street corner. Tender mercies!

Hey – somebody should tell Cameron to write me. I want to write him, but this p-day was filled up with redoing the map of Merlo. I´ll explain someday with pictures.

The four young investigators are all still a go for their baptism on the 12 of July. We had a tough time getting them to church on Sunday because it was the day they vote. Here they are assigned to vote in specific places, but it is not always close, nor are families kept together. The dad may have to vote in one city and the mom has to vote in another that is like 6 train stations away. And it´s not like they can just hop in their car and go from one to the next. It was really frustrating and we had to really work to have a successful Sunday with them in church. I promised them blessings and said that it was really, really important and they did make it there.

Ready for an interesting trial of my faith story? One morning during personal study I suddenly had this impression that instead of watching “Finding Faith in Christ” with the 4 kids that afternoon we needed to watch “The Testaments.” I tried to override the feeling because “The Testaments is 65 minutes long and the other is only 25. 65 minutes is a HUGE sacrifice for one lesson – even if it is with 4 that will soon be baptized. But I knew it was because the Spirit was telling me that it was what they needed to develop a testimony of the atonement of Christ. So I presented the feeling and idea to my companion and we decided to go with it, even though it would really complicate our afternoon plans. We got to the appointment, put in the DVD and the machine wouldn't read it. DVD players in Argentina frequently refuse to read church DVDs – ORIGINALS…. man if them will read bootlegged movies, but originals – forget it. We put it in again, cleaned it, blew in the machine, prayed a TON and nope. No go. Not on your life. I couldn´t understand for a million dollars why I had had that impression so distinctly if then the machine wouldn´t let us watch the movie. And even weirder is that it read Finding faith in Christ, so we ended up watching that. And weirdly enough it was perfect… I even cried I felt the Spirit so strong. I rarely cry. Almost never. It was so incredible. But I couldn´t understand why I had felt that we needed to watch the other. I asked my companion that evening what she thought about it and she is so wise that she instantly replied that she had been pondering it too and thinks that it is like the Lord trying the faith of Abraham to see if he was willing to sacrifice Isaac, but then he didn´t have to go through with it in the end. The Lord tried me to see if I was willing to sacrifice so much time, but then didn´t make me go through with it. I loved the comparison and felt that it really strengthened my testimony and I was humbly proud to have been as willing as Abraham was to do what I was asked. And then the Lord said, “well done, you would have done it, so don´t worry about it, I´ll take it from here.” Talk about cool!

Don´t worry about me, I´m all better and my coat doesn’t even smell like throw up. I´m too much of a cheapskate to dry clean it for now because it´s $40 pesos. And not just that… I´d have to go without it for 2 or maybe 3, 4, or 5 days. It´s winter. Hello, how could I do that? I´m quite content and one day, I will dry clean it – before I come home I promise!

Hermana Benton called me and said that you wanted to make sure I wasn't running a fever. I assured her that I didn´t and she said she´d let you know. You got to talk to the President too? Isn´t he so awesome! I love him. He mentioned the Thanksgiving thing (coming home the day before it) to us too, I hope it doesn´t mean that our end of the mission tour of Buenos Aires doesn´t get cut short a day because I have been looking forward to it all mission long. That is what the pastores (leaving missionaries) do right before they go to the airport – they go on a tour with the APs and the President. I don´t want to get gypped out of it. But I obviously want to be home for Thanksgiving. Ummmm. Mashed potatoes and gravy!

I cut my hair, no, just trimmed it to get rid of the split ends and remind it to grow again. I promise not to cut it again until I come home. I have gotten quite fond of having long hair again.

This transfer my motto is one that the President has been teaching us for a while.

“Circumstances do not determine results” Allow me to apply it to our situation. White wash, Father´s Day (Sunday – investigators that can´t come), Voting (Sunday, investigators that can´t come and members that can´t pick them up), moving to another pension, passing a kidney stone, and losing about an hour and a half of proselyting time a day walking to and from the bus station in your area… and all of that doesn´t determine the results of the transfer because we are going to have 4 baptisms! I am going forward with faith and don´t even let a single doubt or fear enter my brain. I just say that we will find a way to make it happen… because the Lord is on our side.

Grandma Olson – did I ever tell you that in my last area I bought this giant can of Nesquik and every time I make myself some super chocolaty chocolate milk I think of you and remember how much I love you. I hope that you know that I pray for you each and every day and am so grateful for all that you have done for me. The other day I bought you a really cool souvenir and I´m looking forward to giving it to you!

Grandma and Grandpa Jensen – I feel so happy to know that I am a Jensen. We have such a great legacy of faithful members of the church and I love being able to tell people that all my family are members of the church and they are active. So many missionaries, so many lives affected and blessed all because 2 people fell in love! I stole that from a country song, but it´s true. When you think about your posterity you should be incredibly proud. I hope to have such a faithful posterity as you do!

We hadn´t heard a thing about Farrah Fawcett, but I found out on Saturday about Michael Jackson. I was truly sad because his early stuff is great.

I finally got my leather scripture cases yesterday. They turned out so well and she does each drawing by hand in the leather. This morning as I studied the scriptures in their new cases – my study was literally funner. It´s like the first time you use the Venus razor and Skintimate you received for Christmas and the first time you use the new pens and write in a new notebook – it´s just funner.

Today my companion stopped to contact this couple and at the end of the 10 minute conversation they were attacking me and the states for being the cause of swine fever. It was a difficult moment for me because I have a ton of USA pride. But I let it go. My companion was mortified and embarrassed at the behavior of a fellow Argentine and she admitted that he was totally in the wrong. That made me feel a little better.

About the move – it is dragging on because the Elder in charge of the pensiones is super busy. We begged the President and there´s not much he can do. We begged the Elder and he´s doing the best he can, but it´s still a good while away and we have no clue who will help us realize it. I shudder to think. The place is definitely not furnished.

Uncle Ron said I should be a writer… I just might do that. I love to write.

I love Padua. It is such a great area and I feel like if I die here (finish the mission) it´s fine. We´ll see what the Lord has in store. For all we know we´ll stay together this one and the next and then the President will white wash me again to train – because we will be getting a bunch of new sisters that transfer. We´ll see. I´d like to stay here I think.

Romina, Brian, Yamila, and Nico are very great because they accept tithing and the Word of Wisdom, but it is super hard getting them to church especially when their parents don´t want to or cannot come. Romina, Brian, and Yamila are all brothers and sisters, and Nico is the son of a less active member we are trying to reactivate, we are also teaching the Dad. There is a lot of potential with others, but many of them need to get married and many need to get divorced before they can get married. That always complicates things.

Nata – I hope you had a stellar birthday. I thought about you a bunch that day.

Jason – have a wonderful birthday and eat lots of cake.

I love you all and am happier than you can imagine. I miss you tons and pray for you constantly.

Could you all add Liliana, Beatriz and Santiago to your prayers? We need all the help we can get… and so do they!

Wubba more than the move that will someday take place!

Hermana Jensen

p.s The gospel is so true I can't even believe it!

I Love Everything...Even Kidney Stones!

Hola,

I am super excited to get one last package! In it you could add: stuffing, chicken in a biscuit, Cheese Whiz, Reese's Pieces, packages of instant hot cocoa, good Q-tips that actually have some cotton, makeup remover and candy (other than Snickers which I can get here). Oh, and a hole puncher we can use to make holes for our binders. Thanks so much!

Tell the new missionary to bring a pair of garden gloves for service projects, but to put her name in them because it is highly probable they will be stolen.

Happy birthday to Nata and Jason! I sent home treats for your birthdays in the package you got like 3 months ago… I over plan.

So we found a great apartment and the papers are already signed. The office elders have to arrange for light and gas to work and install some kitchen cabinets. It looks like we´ll be getting in the new place in the end of the month. Which to us feels super far away. The new place is a block from the church and a block from the train station! It was literally handed to us on a silver platter by the Lord. The move is overwhelming and won't be easy. We have no boxes, no truck, and no time. Moving will come out of p-day and proselyting time and I don´t have much desire to sacrifice either of them. :)

I made Brown Sugar Chicken and sent it home with President and Sister Benton after Zone Conference. All she had to do was bake it and serve with rice. I hope they liked it.

In Zone Conference President Benton talked about how we should all study our Patriarchal Blessings and put them in scripture form and add foot notes. I about died because I had already decided that I was going to do that the next time I have access to a computer. He read my mind.

We have 4 kids that have baptismal dates and 3 of them were in church with us last Sunday – the other was sick. Nicolas – age 11, Brian – age 12, Yamila – age 10, and Romina – age 14. It is usually easier to baptize kids because they don´t work on Sundays, smoke, drink, or have problems with the Law of Chastity…nor are they waiting for a divorce!

We had to really pull some teeth to get them in church with us, but in the end, it was worth all the money we spent in remises (taxis). If all goes according to plan, the 4 of them will be baptized together on the 12 of July! Pray for them, please… they are our hope for the transfer!

FYI- we learned not to trust local kiosk type joints on the street corner to do our photocopies. They will try to totally pull one on ya. They will do the photocopies and send you out the door and then when you look at the photos you realize that there was next to no toner in the machine. I of course returned and made them do it again, but it totally astounds me how they would do that to the customer. Hello – imagine going to a copy store and having them try to send you away with crummy copies…

My companion and I won the prize (for having good numbers) and were allowed to pick a companionship of Elders and have them come work in our area for 3 hours. We chose the other companionship of Elders that had the best numbers from their District. Maybe they will find us a family we can baptize!

There is this dog that we named Alejo and his 2 followers that terrorize us all 15 blocks from where we get off the bus to the front door of our apartment. They just bug us the whole way home. Alejo barks and barks and acts like he´s going to bite you, but so far hasn´t. He just lives on that street and for some reason picks us every night to follow home. It´s really annoying. I´m glad we´re moving, we won´t pass Alejo and his gang anymore! He is so filthy that I shudder to think of what he carries in his fur. I´m not going to miss Alejo.

Before I forget… I was totally mistaken when I said we were the first sisters ever to walk the streets of San Antonio de Padua. It is not true. It made me feel cool for a while to think I was the pioneering sister missionary in the big bad world of Elder town, but then I was informed that sisters have been here before. So anyways, it was fun while it lasted.

It all depends on how much room I have in my suitcases if I will bring the sleeping bag home. My Argentine companion also sleeps in one, but it is not a thing they all do. If I don´t have room, I´ll leave it with some missionary that will be very grateful.

I would like to take advantage of this time to thank you Mom and Dad for never going inactive. When I think about how many times throughout our lives we have the chance to say “no more!” and quit… there are a lot of times. But you two never gave up. You never said “I´m just too offended to go back to church” or anything of the sort. Were it not for your faith and testimonies – I would not be a missionary in Argentina in this moment. I am eternally grateful for the commitment that you have shown to honor and keep your covenants. I owe you a great deal for giving me such an example of faith and dedication to the truth. Here in Padau there are a ton of people that are super offended and say, “I will never come back” and I am so glad that that was not something that entered our home. I mean it. You should be very proud to be active in the church. So many are not.

This past week I almost fell on my back in the street when I stepped on a banana peel. Yeah, that really happens, and it really is slippery! I about died laughing that I had done it. In my defense… It was dark and I didn´t see it on the sidewalk, but boy did I laugh. Thank heavens I caught myself and didn´t fall!

My back still hurts, but this time I know why. It is because my great winter coat is pretty heavy and even more so when I have my scripture bag crossing my chest--it just makes it feel even heavier. It can´t go under my coat or the coat won´t close. I even took out my Triple and now I am just walking around with pamphlets but it still really hurts. That is just part of life in winter. I am pretty sure the only solution is pray for spring.

So on Sunday afternoon we did something that I have wanted to do all mission long. We took a 2 hour nap! The heater running, the shutters closed so it is pitch black in the room, we set the cell phone and slept for 2 blissful hours. Before you panic and call the President to beg for forgiveness for my sin… allow me to explain just why we did so. It just so happens that kidney stone number 4 decided to pass. Hehe. (2 at BYU and 2 in Argentina!) I woke up Sunday morning and knew I was in for a party. I carefully read the packages of drugs you sent so as to not overdose and kill myself and took the necessary medication – determined to take it in stride. Unfortunately the Promethazine didn´t take care of the nausea and I was already throwing up before we left for church. We took a remis (taxi) to go and get one of our investigators. I was very ill. We picked her up and went to the church. I got out of the car and walked for the chapel door. I had 2 options: try to run to the bathroom and throw up the last 6 feet before I made it to the bathroom OR try to walk to the bathroom and throw up pretty much the whole way there. What would you choose? I walked 6 steps and made a break for it. Companion or no companion I had to get to a restroom! I put my hand over my mouth to try to contain what was already coming out, but my hand only held a tiny bit. Then the vomit escaped my hand and started to fill the right sleeve of my dry clean only winter coat. I am not even kidding. It reached clear up to my elbows inside my long sleeved blouse and coat. It was one of the most disgusting feelings I have ever had. I finished throwing up in the toilet, but the mess I left on the bathroom door and the floor around the stall was quite pathetic. It got in my hair, on my scarf, on my coat, in my coat, on my skirt and I had nothing to change into. My companion and the investigator came strolling into the bathroom and we tried to play cool and make it seem like nothing. We said things like “oh, I´ll just clean this right up and we´ll be fine.” Hello – it was a joke! The poor woman probably thought to herself “these crazy Mormons go to church even when they´re dead sick.” Anyways… I sent my comp with the investigator to Relief Society and finished cleaning up. I had to take off my shirt, and coat and wore my comp´s coat the rest of the 3 hours of church. I took off my skirt, washed it, and put it back on – cold and wet. I tried to wash my hair, but missed some spots. I felt better and we went to go get our other investigators and finish out the meetings. After church we had to send them off in a remis and it took like 20 minutes for it to get there. By then my pain had come back and I was pacing and fighting back tears and no one besides my companion knew why. We finally walked to the station, took a taxi, went home, ate our sack lunch and decided to go to bed. She was also pretty sick with a nasty cold, so we took 2 hours to try to get well and at 4:00 we went back out to work and finish the week – we did our contacts and taught 2 lessons! The pain hasn´t returned, so I either passed one, or it was just moving around and didn´t really drop. Either way I am proud to say that I didn´t shed a single tear. I know the Lord helped me and that all in all, it wasn´t that bad. That was my Father´s day… I´m SURE yours was better. But we had 4 investigators in church – 3 of whom have baptismal dates!

I decided this week that for us to have true success and see miracles this transfer I have to believe that we will receive them… that´s all. My own lack of faith and doubtful thoughts were like poison that I was drinking drop by drop. Now instead of thinking, “what if we don´t baptize this transfer… I´ll just die!” I think “how cool is it that we are going to have 4 baptisms with a white wash transfer!” I decided that I have to believe and have more faith. My own doubts were wearing me down. So now I believe perfectly that we will have miracles and we will. It is that simple. Choose to win. Choose to succeed, choose to receive blessings and you will. Try it with me!

Jason – everyone knows I´m all business. Your advice has proven helpful.
Nata – have a great time in Spain – buy me a scarf of something, k?
Mommy – thanks in advance for the awesome package you will send me. As you can tell I am hungry for the states! I have this transfer and 3 more. I am so pumped! Prepare to see some serious changes in me in these last few months.
Daddy - I bought you a cool present today. You are going to love it!

I love you so much. Study the scriptures every day. Have FHE every week. Never go inactive!

All the love and joy that I possess,
Hermana Stacey Jensen

Sights From Argentina

Carving of the Buenos Aires Temple

...fishers of men

Celebrating 10 months out (taken 3 months ago)

Week 2 Has Now Begun In Padua!

Well, there is so much to say.

First of all I love San Antonio de Padua, but it sure comes with its challenges. White washing an area is difficult-- if you can imagine. This first week we were able to find most of the investigators the elders left us, and we committed 3 to be baptized. The thing is that these are very fragile dates… it´s FAR from certain that they will happen, but the only way is to start somewhere and work with them to make it to the day. One is the 11 year old son of a less active member. His name is -----. He is good, but it is hard to get him to church because we can´t bring him alone and his mom works in a fruit store. But we have plans. He is the most sure that we have. And the others are a mother and daughter, but there are obstacles to overcome, she smokes and both were sick this last week, so couldn´t come to church. They are ----- and -----. They might not be so happy with some of the changes they need to make, but we have our faith and are going to give it our best shot.

The Elders left us a bunch of teaching records in the area book. We have been working a ton with member referrals here. They just might be the ticket to success!

About the storm… pretty cool, you can imagine that storms here are a lot like that. Instantly there is a mud flood and it comes down so hard you think it might bruise your skin. I´m thrilled to hear that we did not have any flooding. I am truly sorry to hear that the garden was destroyed, that is a bummer. We can be thankful that our garden is not our only source of food as it was for the farmers of old. Imagine what a storm like that would have done to their faith.

What do you mean to Davy everything is a phone? How cool is that about web calls. Did you know that my laptop has a webcam? It does. I don´t remember if I ever really got it to work, but I know it has one.

About Sarah… you could try calling the LA Mission and asking for a forwarding address. That is the only solution I have if she´s not on facebook. The only address I have is in Alaska, but I bet she´s studying somewhere else. Let me know if you want me to send you the Alaska address.
Thanks for being diligent with all that. I really appreciate it.

As for stuff that you can send with the Pollock family (who FYI is the senior AP right now… and the one who served where I am right now in Papua) You could send me some of those powder packets of Ranch that you add to sour cream, also another bottle of Ranch Dressing, a thing of Peanut Butter and um… let me think. There has got to be something I really need. I´ll let you know what else comes to mind next week. Thanks for the heads up.

We want to move because we live way out of our area and it´s a huge hassle. The quickest route from the bus stop to the pench every night (and every morning for that matter) is 15 blocks – 22 minutes walking quickly and not stopping to street contact anybody… which is obviously not good because street contacting is what we do. The pench in itself is great, but the electricity is a disaster. The power failed and we have been limited to only use the heater on low. We were forced to study with our coats and scarves on in the morning-- it is so cold. There is someone who supposedly came to fix it today, but I haven´t been there yet.

Today we had Sisters Conference and even though it is proselyting time already, we are doing Internet… with President´s permission of course. Anyways, we have got to move because we lose about an hour and a half of proselyting time each day just going to and from home. Nobody we are teaching lives where we live. They all live clear on the other side of the area. I want to move over there, but it is more dangerous, but still, for time and convenience and stuff… I´m willing to be like Simba from the Lion King and say “I laugh in the face of danger!” I don´t want to spend my last 6 months or whatever I have left wasting such time every day… and at night when people are actually home to be taught and members can accompany us. That is just not the recipe to have success here and I promised the Lord that I would do all in my power to give Him success.

Not only is it a waste of time and a big expense, but it is exhausting to have to start each and every day walking a mile… hear me out, when the day is coming to a close, you don´t want to think “ok, time for the last mile of rushed walking” – it´s more than one can take, and after just 7 days of doing it, I´m already sick of it. So the President authorized us to look for a new apartment, but that´s easier said than done, especially when you can´t just hop on the Internet or spend a bunch of time looking.

So the Sisters Conference: I spent a ton of time planning this 45 minute workshop on contacts to present and then wouldn´t you know it… they put me last and we were so far behind that when we finally were up, it was like, what do we do? The food was to arrive at 1 and so we kind of shortened it, kind of rushed it, and I was a little less than pleased with how it turned out. I tried not to let the time thing ruin it, everyone said it was great and the President was super impressed with it all, but I felt like we could have done MUCH better had we not been so time restrained. But if everyone else said it went well, I have to just accept it. But I tell you – I know it could have been better.

Being in the zone of Merlo is like starting a new semester in college. You´re lost, you´re confused, you´re stressed, you set all these incredibly high goals and you start with what you have, but every night you fall on your knees and beg your Father in Heaven to carry you through one more day. It is just mentally demanding. All day long you are lost, as you learn, you grow, as you are stretched, you learn to rely on your Savior, but it is hard. I am not going to tell you it´s not.

But one of the biggest tender mercies that the Lord has given me to be able to handle it is my companion. She is so capable. She took upon herself the responsibility of learning all the bus routes and thus making it possible for us to do what we do each day. She faithfully searches each bus that we see all day long and looks up their routes (which I don´t understand in the book I bought – but she does) and that is the only way that I personally have been able to cope. Because she is native she does colectivos and basically navigates us all day long. I on the other hand am in charge of all the little details, like remembering the keys to the church, having pamphlets, keeping us on schedule, and other stuff that seems very trivial compared to what she does, but without the little things we would fail. So we are a perfect team. We complete one another in this challenge we chose to see as an opportunity.

On Sunday we had a Stake Conference broadcasted from Salt Lake and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Unfortunately we went in a taxi that we got to accommodate all of our investigators and not one ended up in the taxi with us. 26 pesos later we showed up all alone. Lame. 2 were sick, ---- couldn´t come with us without his mother… and 3 others stood us up completely. Lame.

FYI – we tried to laminate little hand outs we made for our work shop and they tried to charge me 3 pesos (almost a dollar) for each of the 2x3 cards. AS IF! We bough contact paper and did it ourselves for less than 7 pesos total!

As for that Hermana that is coming, I thought of more advice: ankle socks to wear under nylons are great in the winter. Buy shoes with thicker soles because the uneven sidewalks and dirt roads rip up the soles pretty quickly. Bring Ziploc bags – lots of them and in various sizes. You can find them here, but they are EXPENSIVE. You will need them for random things. At least I did. Oh and the most important one of all… If she is struggling with space or going over the weight limit with her luggage, bring a big suitcase and a carry on that is formed, but for the middle sized one, just buy a giant shoulder bag that is sofá – it weighs much less and you can stow a ton more in it. It´s a hassle in the airport, but you only do that twice (or four times if you are me and serve in 2 missions. :)

Mommy – I love you so, when I see Hermana Benton I remember you and how much I look forward to a hug from you and miss you. The truth is that each day I am more and more thankful that I was raised in the church, and even more – by ACTIVE members of the church. That is something that I took for granted all my life, but no more. I am so blessed. So blessed.

Daddy – Happy Father´s day on Sunday! I love you so. The other night I had a dream that I got a hug from you. When I woke up I almost cried because I want one so much.

It is weird that you are getting information about when I go home. I still don´t understand clearly if I have 3 transfers left including this one or 4 including this one. If you say that I am due home around Thanksgiving that would mean that I have four more. I don´t know if I will “die” here or not. I would like to go to campo, (the country) but more importantly I want to be where the Lord wants me to be. If I never get to serve in the outskirts or the ghetto, life goes on. Argentina is different enough for me – even if I am in the “city.”

Nata – I hope that you go forth with faith and courage in your callings. Davy is such a little stud. I can´t wait to give him a high five and teach him Argentine hand gestures.

I love you so. If you wouldn´t mind this week – I want you to pray for me to quit comparing myself to others. I need to just let things happen a little more. I need to just relax a little. But I´m afraid that if I relax – I will fall apart. Pray for me to adapt and be at peace. Thanks. I know you are always praying for me.

I have to go. I´m sorry you had to wait all day long for this.

Wubba,
Hermana Jensen!
~~~~~~~~~~~
1 COMMENTS:

ajohns37 said...
We can hardly believe the experiences and things our young Hermanas are going through. It is so humbling of what they are seeing and doing, yet their tremendous faith and example to go forth doing what they know is true and have been called to do. We love you and have great familyhood (?word) kinship, felt with you knowing we both have daughters doing the same thing. All our love, the Familia Johns
JUNE 16, 2009 9:45 PM

Dear Brother and Sister Jensen,

We are pleased to inform you that Hermana Stacey Lynn Jensen is completing an honorable full-time mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in the Argentina Buenos Aires West Mission. Your missionary's release date will be November 26, 2009!!!!!!! (exclamations added by the mom)

We are so excited to have a date...and yes she opted to stay 3 weeks longer instead of coming home 1 week early due to the transfer dates-- but if you know Stacey that won't surprise you a bit. Now we get to watch the mail for the flight plans to find out what time she will be arriving on Thanksgiving Day. Wahoo--we couldn't be happier! :)

A 'White Wash' In Merlo!

In Castellano the word for transferred and the word for translated is the same, so I can honestly and sarcastically say that I have been TRANSLATED! I get a kick out of that every time I think about it because even though I loved spending 6 months in Haedo-- I needed a change so I truly feel like I have been translated.

So the transfer ended and on Monday morning we went to the misión offices in Ramos Mejia and awaited the inevitable. As we were shaking hands with the President and Hermna Benton before the meeting began (as we always do row by row, every missionary) my future started to reveal itself. When I shook the Presidents hand he said, “you ready for some fun stuff?” I said, “sí” and just looked at him. My heart started to beat a thousand times a minute and during the whole meeting I was racking my brain trying to figure out just what was ahead for me. Eventually the moment arrived. I was right about replacing Elders and totally wrong about where. The thing is that during the part of the meeting when the APs showed all the numbers and success and stuff it became quite clear that the zone that had the most baptisms was Merlo. I then started to covet the areas in Merlo and desire to go there.....but I thought there was no chance because President had mentioned that he just might send me to Aldo Bonzo to open it to Sisters there. Anyway, they showed us that as a misión we had 172 converts! It is a very high number (the record is 179) and I felt so happy!

They began showing all the transfers and when they passed the zone of Aldo Bonzo I began wondering what the President had meant. But then to my great surprise and joy, I was shown with Sister Carrasco replacing two Elders in the area of San Antonio de Padua in MERLO! When that happens it´s called a “white wash.” In L.A. we called it “flushing the area” but whatever you call it, you can imagine what it means-- a lot of work for those who show up not knowing the members... the buses, where the church is, where to do Internet, where to take your dirty clothes, where to buy fruit, where to photocopy your map and so on. You know nothing more than what you can learn by reading the area book and the letter the Elders leave you.

Turns out that this area has been the home of two Elders that later served as APs. The current senior AP Elder Pollock served here about a year ago, so he told us a little bit about the area and how great it is. If I am not mistaken we are the first sister missionaries EVER to serve in Merlo. It is a little bit dangerous – the President told us to be careful at night. I think I am going to start strapping my camera to my skirt with a belt and hide it under my coat instead of putting it in my bag, so that just in case I get robbed… I lose my scriptures and pamphlets and nothing more.

Before I forget… do you remember some years ago when you gave that Spanish mom with her 3 boys a ride and the baby Paco had some eye problems…? Well, the other day they popped into my mind and it dawned on me that if you still know where they live, you need to send the missionaries to contact them. It would be a great referral for them. So, would you mind looking into that? They totally need the gospel!

Is it true that they are opening a mission in China? We heard a rumor and I want confirmation. I hope it´s true… the second comino might happen soon!

Here people eat hamburgers empty… just the bun, the patty, and ketchup, but no lettuce, no cheese, no pickles, no onions, no mushrooms… just the patty and something to spread on the bread. It is very boring!

I´m a little Christmas hungry… walking around all bundled up at night and thinking that soon the day will be here....but it´s ok, when I come home and Christmas really is on its way… that will be a horse of a different color!

Mom- do you remember like a month ago I sent pictures of the baptism of Antonio and Andrea? Could you forward those pictures to Hermano Achinelli at this address: ------- He baptized them and wants pictures and I don't have time to look for them. Thanks!

Guess what… the other night this guy in the store pulled an awesome pick-up line on my companion – Hermana Di Stéfano… he said, “does it hurt” and when she said, “what” he said “being that beautiful” she had to explain it all to me afterwards, but we died laughing! The funnier part is how quick on her feet she is because she responded, “I don´t know, ask my companion!”

She and I also taught a workshop in the district meeting a week ago. We were assigned to teach ánimo – which doesn´t translate really well, but it means like energy or I don´t know… there isn´t a word. Anyways, it was fun to do, I felt like a leader for a minute finally giving one of the workshops and not just listening to it. I enjoyed it!

For the first time in my life I am so tired that I fell asleep saying my prayers before bed. The thing is that I started being more descriptive expressing my gratitude and so when you are that specific naming stuff, it takes more time and then makes it a lot more likely to fall asleep before you finish. I feel guilty… I need to find some way to give thanks, but not fall asleep while I pray. Don´t worry, I´ll come up with something!

My new address is -------- in the area of San Antonio de Padua in the zone of Merlo. It is a cool apartment and we spent a while getting all settled in and now I feel a little bit better. I hate not being unpacked, so once we got unpacked and stuff I was able to calm down a little bit.

My new companion has almost 9 months and is from Neuquén too. Just like Hermana Di Stéfano. It´s in the South part of Argentina and she is very timid and speaks softly, but I like her. I know that we are going to get along well and we are going to work super hard. I rededicated myself to be 100% obedient and work “15 minutes more” each day—President talked about that in the meeting. I woke up early Monday morning (the day of the transfer) and Tuesday morning and couldn´t go back to sleep so I took the extra 40 minutes each morning to talk with my Heavenly Father. I told Him that I know I need to be better and that my faith is weaker than I want it to be. I told Him that I want to be led to find the people He has prepared. I promised that I would work until I bleed and give until I fall. I want to finish the mission working so hard that there isn´t even time to eat at night because we are so busy confirming appointments.

When I saw my picture going to Merlo… everyone was so surprised and like gasped at the drastic change of sending sisters to Merlo. I saw my picture and thought to myself… I hope the mission never ends. I don´t want to go home… I need to do this! It was super empowering and really hit me hard.... the President received revelation and has sent us here to San Antonio de Padua....Merlo because this is where we need to be. I am ready to work and change and sacrifice and give and testify and do it until I can´t speak one more syllable. I am going to ask for miracles and be worthy and have enough faith to receive them!

FYI – I left Haedo 1 with 2 investigators-- each with baptismal dates. One is Lucia who will finally be 18 years old and will be baptized and the other is a woman who last week stopped US in the street and asked if we were going to visit her. We took her name and address and taught her, brought her to church and she is progressing great. She has to quit smoking and everything else with the Word of wisdom, but she is truly prepared and I am confident that she will make it. We were also were stopped in the street Saturday night by a man who had been taught before I was sent there. He told us that he had moved, gave us his new address and we invited him to church the next day. He showed up and Hermana Di Stéfano with her mini will begin teaching him. I am sure that he´ll be baptized too. So maybe the “explosion of baptisms” will take place after I leave, but hey… that´s ok.

Random story – Antonio and Andrea give us a ride home after FHE every Monday and Antonio always speeds up pretending he is going to run over the stray dogs in the street and Andrea always screams and panics. It makes me laugh. I remember that I was once like her and Antonio reminds me of you daddy. It is great fun!

This letter is very poorly written because I am telling everything out of order-- but when Hermana Carrasco and I finally got to our pension in Padua and walked in, it was weird because you could almost feel that Elders had been there. They were kind enough to leave us milk in the fridge and 2 rolls of T.P., along with clean dishes and some cleaning supplies. The place hasn´t been dusted or swept in quite a while, but I am quite confident that they made a sincere effort to leave it in good condition for us.

Nata and Jason – your son is so dang cute! I want to eat him. I hope you are doing very well and that you are having FHE every week.

I hope you are doing that too, Mom and Dad! I love you so much!

Gotta go, I beg you to pray for us. We don´t know where we are, who anyone is, but we know the direction of the church. Please pray for us to find people that want to listen. We need tender mercies and we need lots of them. I´m scared, but I have faith!

I love you so much and I have faith that I am where the Lord wants me to be!

Thanks for the music… thanks for everything!

Hermana Jensen!
San Antonio de Padua - MERLO!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
1 comments:
ajohns37 said...
Love you Famila Jensen. She'll do well in Merlo. It hit us that our little Hermana just probably hit her last transfer in Mercedes. Wow, what a ride, but as President Monson says, "Enjoy the journey." and we have with you! All our love, The Familia Johns.

June 10, 2009 1:26 PM

Happy Birthday To You!

Even though I forgot to mention it in last weeks email, I did wish you a happy birthday. I was the first one to do it because when I said my morning prayer at 6:30 here (3:30 there) I prayed for you to have a good birthday. I hope it was great and full of everything good!

About the high school reunion... have they sent around questionnaires or anything? If they do will you respond in my behalf? Thanks!

Davy... I bought him a t shirt and sent it home in that suitcase... I don´t exactly want you to go digging for it because that would ruin all the surprises, but I´m afraid he might grow out of it. I say we just wait and see and if it doesn´t fit him, then oops, we can put it on a teddy bear or something. What do you shink?

Nata – your last letter said just the right things and made me feel happy! Have a ton of fun in Spain with Marta! Tell her hello for me and buy me something nice!

Advice for the sister missionary – buy a good sleeping bag. It will be your best friend. But tight spandex pants to wear under your skirts. Invest in good water boots. The ones we found me are perfect! A giant two-person umbrella is convenient being that we are always with a companion. Fabrics... it´s obvious – go light in the summer, layer up in the winter. Buy a good outlet converter. Bring a dropper to purify your water, or you can buy one in a pharmacy here. You´ll want to double up on socks and bring a good pair of gloves.

Daddy – We got a record high of 7 referrals this past week, but it was not quite as amazing as it sounds because 4 of them were repeat referrals and the people rejected us for a second time. But hey. They try. We don´t knock doors that much because it doesn´t work. We street contact... all day long. We go from street contact to street contact. When you stop them in the street you try to get their address and then we go and visit them a few days later to teach them. It´s called an appointment to return – and it is what we do a ton. I LOVED the advice you gave me and it is just what I have been worrying about. Today in the celestial room I was praying and I told my Heavenly Father that I had so much I still wanted to do and that the time is flying by. The answer I felt was “be still” and I decided to just keep doing what I´m doing and try not to have a “cram it all in attitude.” How perfect that you advised me to do the same. I value this counsel more than you know.

Mommy – could you do me a favor and try to find the sheet music to the CDs you sent me of Spanish songs. Especifically the song “all my days” – “toda mi vida” I would like to sing it in my last transfer meeting and will need to start practicing asap.

About the sponge foam fight... we were filling plastic bags with the little foam pieces and then they make pillows with them. So of course as you fill the bags you have to fight a little bit. In the video – you can´t tell, but I was almost throwing up at the end with my back turned because I accidentally swallowed one and was quite unwell as it went down. But it was super fun! It is service we do for the family that sells the pillows.
Quote that I love: the intelligent learn from their mistakes; the wise learn from the mistakes of everybody else. “Los inteligentes aprenden de sus errores, los sabios, de los demás.” Pretty deep isn´t it!

Nata – Could you write to Hermana Barrera and tell her I sent her a bag of stuff with the mission mail and to bug the Elders for it. And could you ask her to send you the recipe with the measurements of all the ingredients needed to make milanesa? Thanks!

This week we did service weeding a small, I mean small garden of an 84 year old woman. I felt just like Mommy using a giant kitchen knife to make the dirt all pretty where it hits the cement. It was super fun and made me decide to have a SMALL garden of my own some day. We took cool pictures like that old farmer couple with the shovel and pitch fork! My back hurts. Low back. I can´t make it go away. I stretch, I do everything. I need my daddy to pop my back. Oh where oh where could he be?

Have you been receiving real letters from me lately? I have sent 2 home lately and I want to know if they are getting to you.

We are in week 6 of my first transfer without baptisms since I arrived to Argentina. Let me just say that a transfer without baptisms drags by like 2 transfers. It is so frustrating to work and work and work and have “nothing” to show for it. (Yes, seeds planted...) but it is depressing and makes me feel like a crummy missionary. The President wasn´t too hard on me in my interview, he just said to try and baptize one of the people we had... but none of them are ready.

Well, I am surprised at how well I am taking the news of Matt's death. That goes to show just how protected I am by the Lord. It was Tuesday at 9 pm Argentina time when the closure finally just came to me. I knew that it had a lot to do with the “closure vibes” my mommy was surely sending me from the memorial service. I felt very blessed to know that you were thinking of me and the feelings of peace that I received have stayed with me. I couldn´t see the words very well on the scanned program, but the pictures were crystal clear. I am super glad you found the donut falls pictures and feel glad that they were able to use them.

On other notes...

The other day I had this deeper realization as we walked in the street that we are all children of God. I stopped dumbfounded as I tried to think that He literally knows me personally, and my companion, and every single person in the street. He knows their names, their fears, their sins, their thoughts, everything. It is literally mind boggling. Ponder it for a second and you too will be literally confused at the grandness of the simple statement “I am a child of God.”

I had this one day last week that I actually didn´t want to go out in the street to proselyte after lunch. It was freezing and raining and even with my umbrella and gloves and coat and scarf and everything... I just looked outside and thought to myself, “do we really have to go out in that?” I felt ashamed at my lack of desire. Obviously we went out in it anyways because we´re obedient, but for the first time in the mission I was tempted to just say “nah, we´ll just chill here in the chapel for a bit.” Rest assured that we did not.

Story about today... for some unknown reason I lost the hot water in my morning shower. I stood their freezing and soapy and pled with the Lord to give me just 30 seconds of hot water to rinse off and get out. He said no. I admit that I actually shed tears as I freezingly rinsed off and got out. Then I cried to my companion telling her how much I hate the shower (and this is in the dream apartment...) She made me feel all better telling me that I should throw my flip-flop at it ... which made me feel much better. Then she had me say things like “I didn´t want to take a hot shower, hot showers are for wimps!” It is powerful what that can do because I felt all better afterwards. But the tears that fell from my eyes were warmer than the water that washed away the suds from my shivering body this morning. Wahoo! Gotta love the mission!

When somebody comes to the door with their keys to open the gate and let us in I get all excited like a dog that hears the keys or his chain and knows he´s going to go for a walk. The reason for this is that lessons taught on the inside of the gate count for our numbers... lessons taught where they don´t let us in the gate don´t count for jack squat. So the sound of keys is super happy. I feel so much like a dog. Does that make you laugh?

Story of the week: We were finishing a lesson with this woman and her busy, busy grandson
threw a teddy bear at her just as she started to say the prayer. Luckily I had delayed just a second closing my eyes and saw the little stuffed dog flying straight for her head. I stretched out my hand and grabbed the dog about 3 inches before it struck the praying grandmother. It was like this awesome superman moment and I saved the day... or prayer! I felt so glad that my Daddy had invested his time teaching me to play catch because it came in handy!

The miracle and the failure of the week was this sweet old widowed man (84) that we found, taught, and committed to be baptized. We lost him 3 days later because his family prohibited him from receiving us ever again. So sad....he just wanted to be with his wife again... The other cool part of the story was that after the lesson we taught him he took us around for an hour and we contacted 13 referrals from his neighbors and family that live nearby. Everyone we passed by he stopped and said, “Listen to these girls, they brought me a message of peace!” It was amazing and then it about broke our poor hearts when he told us on the phone he couldn´t receive us anymore. He was almost crying. I hope he passes away soon so Grandpa Olson can teach him the gospel for me in the Spirit World.

FYI : lessons taught to less active members depress me and scare me because no one is safe from personal apostasy. Ex- bishops, ex- missionaries, anybody and everybody can just up and decide not to go to church anymore. I just die a little bit every time I teach someone that they need to endure to the end. I swear I will NEVER quit going to church. NEVER. And I absolutely refuse to let anyone of you do it either! I will drag you kicking and screaming to church before I ever just give up and let you throw away your exaltation.

There are twins in my ward that had their little farewell to go on their missions and there was this movie of their big brother on his mission. It was shown to get them excited and show them all of the fun they are going to have. As I watched the video with pictures set to music – you can only imagine the plans that I was making in my mind for the video I am going to make of my mission. It is going to be so cool! I have tons of pictures I still need to take to realize this dream. Yes Dad, more pictures to take!

So then. I am super excited to be transferred. In case you couldn´t tell. I hope to go to campo, but I´m not sure what the Lord has in store for me. Actually I think it would be really cool to replace Elders, but at the same time that scares me because you´d have to figure everything out yourself without being taught the area....but I just have to wait until the meeting on Monday to find out what my fate is.

Gotta go!

Love you, thanks for sending me closure... I really felt like it just came S.W.A.K. too!

The church is true!
Hermana Jensen

Pictures From Haedo 1

Rain and flooding streets- yay!

It´s Really Just A Transfer-- To Another Area...

Stacey received some sad news on Friday about a friend who had passed away. Since it has always been my goal to have this site represent both the highs and lows of serving a mission, much like the mountains and valleys we each experience in our own daily lives, I have included this weeks letter. In it you will hear her express sadness, shock and grief, but as she closes she reminds us of the truths we know and believe in and the strength we can each gain from being committed and determined to move onward and upward....come what may. And so we will.

~Karen ~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Matthew Alan Peterson 8/11/1986 ~ 5/19/2009 was born in Dayton, Ohio on August 11th 1986 to loving and proud parents Darwin Grant Peterson, Jr. and Celinda Kay Peterson. He passed away at the age of 22 in South Jordan, Utah on May 19th 2009. He was a faithful servant of God and had served an honorable mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. His mission and his faith were the pride and joy of his life. He was dedicated to truth and being an honorable man. He lived his life honorably and dedicated himself to striving to better himself. He was a happy positive young man who worked hard and did well in school. He was always willing to help in another's time of need. He looked to the future and never looked behind. He was known for his wonderful sense of humor that brought the joyful sound of laughter into any room he was in. He made friends easily and was loved by everyone who knew him. He will be remembered for the characteristics that best describe him Honor, Morality, Valiance, Righteousness, Humor, Faithfulness, Talented, Charitable, and Positive. He will be missed and always remembered by his loved ones who remain, which are his father Darwin Peterson, mother Celinda Peterson, brother Christopher Peterson, sister Crystal Versluis, brother-in-law Jordan Versluis, sister April Ferguson, brother-in-law Chadwick Ferguson, and nephews James and Andrew Versluis and Michael Ferguson, and his dear friend Stephen Nelson and the entire Nelson family whom he loved dearly as he loved his own family. A memorial will be held to honor this special man, brother, son, uncle, and friend on Tuesday, the 26th of May at 6:00 p.m. at the LDS chapel located at 1540 W. 10400 S. South Jordan, Utah.

A small family grave side service will be held in Chesaw, Washington for Matthew.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

5/26/09

First off, thanks for informing me as you did about Matt´s death. Having Hermana Benton call and tell me was the right choice because it gave me some time to try to come to terms with it all.

At first I felt like the Lord only let me carry 5% of it... and I was coping quite well. Then little by little He started letting me carry more and more. I would say I´m up to about 35-40% and it´s about 20% more than I would like to be carrying.

I am glad you found the pictures under my bed. I have more on a CD somewhere of when the three of us hiked Donut Falls, but it is obviously too late now. I hope the pictures you found were good ones. I feel truly sad about it all even though I know all that I do about the Plan of Salvation. It doesn´t change the fact that it´s just sad. I have been praying a ton for Stephen and the rest of the Nelson and Peterson family.

Herman Benton called me at 10 pm on Friday and broke the news to me. I was so shocked and confused that I couldn´t remember even half of what she said. I was in denial until I said the companion prayer that night and then was super sad lying in bed trying to sleep. I woke up randomly and have ever since then-- and it´s amazing how your mind can cling to something. I wake up to go to the bathroom and without even consciously thinking it occurs to me that Matt died, and I can´t quite seem to forget it or push it away.

Wouldn´t you know it that the very next day we were teaching the Plan of Salvation to a mother who's son had recently died as well. It was a lesson that left me quite confused about myself. I taught it all in a much more real way than I ever had before, but I was confused that I didn´t cry. She was crying a ton, and I almost felt her pain, but my heart was so numb that I just kept testifying and teaching--but I felt like I was in some other world.

For my own weird healing process I decided to write Matt a letter. I felt a little better after doing it. I turned to my getting over death scripture; Joel 2:12-13

“Therefore also now, saith the Lord, turn ye even to me with all your heart, and with fasting, and with mourning: and rend your heart, and not your garments, and turn unto the Lord your God; for He is gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness, and repenteth him of the evil.”

Talk about a coincidence... we were fasting when I found out. I have so many questions and feel powerless and so far away from the answers I need.

Today I read a talk a Stake President gave and he talked about a vision he had of the spirit world. He said that it was really like this giant school or library where many of the spirits are running around doing family history work. And anyway the point of it is to think of it like a transfer... you are just going to a different area, to do a different, but more important work. I´m trying to see it all like that.

So I promise I am keeping this email as positive as I can. It doesn´t help much that this has been such a draining transfer. It looks like it will be my first without baptisms because all of our investigators are struggling. I have fought almost 6 months in this area and was hoping to leave it on a high, full of incredible miracles worth the trial of my faith.

On the bright side, I learned how to make tortas fritas and tarta this week. They are both yummy. I made little torta fritas in the shape of a baptism (which is a figure of waves – like in water – and then an arrow pointing down in the water... I´ll explain better when I can draw you one.)

Also another thing to be thankful for since we´re playing “the glad game” is that next p-day is temple p-day. I have needed that for so long, once every transfer is just not enough for my soul.

Speaking of temples... the pictures you sent me of the Oquirrh Temple are amazing. Was it already dedicated? I can´t believe how spoiled we are to live within 15 minutes of 3 temples. It is a gorgeous one. I can´t wait to go to the 2 new temples when I get home.

Speaking of going home... interviews with the President this week and the news about Matt made me all reverse trunky. I don´t want to go home... in part because I don´t feel prepared to face what awaits me. Don´t let that feeling make you sad. Just try to understand that it is one way that my spirit is reacting to what is happening. It´s like a big denial thing.

Allow me to explain... we had interviews with the President and he showed me my little paper with my picture and the boxes that represent each transfer and according to the paper I only have 3 left. It was downright weird to see this paper saying that I am a “dying missionary.” I got all nervous because there are so many goals and dreams I haven´t reached yet, like baptizing a complete family. I thought to myself, “wow, I´ll be leaving before I know it... how scary is that!” And then that night I found out about Matt and it made me all weird – for lack of a better word for it.

We had a few days of major heat again.....and then we got caught in the freezing flooding rain yesterday. The weather here is literally unpredictable. I am sure it is totally predictable for those that can refer to the news every night, but since we can´t we hit the streets without umbrellas because we are just plain uninformed!

Good news for you guys... I don´t know if you knew this already, but inside the suitcase I sent home there is a white box (the same one you used the last time you sent me a package) Open the suitcase and remove only the white box. Inside you will find presents for you to enjoy--I hope you yike them!

Bytheway......I love pears and eat 2 of them a day!

The other day the police stopped us and questioned us saying that they had been called because we were behaving suspiciously. The only thing we can think of is that I took a picture of a grocery store sign that I thought was cool. If someone saw me do it, they might have called the police because sometimes they think Yankees are CIA. But the police were very friendly and let us go without a problem. I was all excited to show them my clergy certificate, but he was like, “no, no, it´s OK” and they left.

I will be transferred on the 8th of June and will be so happy to find my way in a new area. This area has been so hard. I have suffered (and of course grown) so much here. I guess I should have said I have grown (and suffered) so much here. That is what Dad said, "The mission can be rewarding and hard or hard and rewarding." I am trying to choose the right way of saying it and living it. Easier said than done.

I appreciate your desires for me to not be sad. If I could just snap my fingers and not be sad I would definitely do it. I would like to thank you for your prayers because I am keenly aware that I have only been able to cope as I have as a result of your prayers and everyone else who is praying for me.

It´s true what we say, “it just goes to show that we never know how long we will be here in this probationary state.”

I don´t know what else to say this week. If I go on, I´ll just say things less than positive. I´m just so heavy... does that make sense? I feel like I am literally under this big, dark cloud. I can´t shake it. I pray and pray and pray and pray and know He listens and is helping me a ton, but still feel so heavy. I feel guilty for feeling this way and that just makes me feel worse.

Oh, one happy thing that I can say is that my companion and I had a good long companionship inventory last Thursday and resolved our differences. We have gone 5 days without a single problem and we get along just like we did the first 2 blissful weeks. We laugh, we joke, we share... I´m not depressed all day long, and even when I am I still joke around with her. I´m just sad when I´m not really busy. You´d think then that that would make my grief quite bearable because I´m a busy missionary, but at the same time not so much because we have almost nobody to teach so the “busy” part is substituted for “street contacting and being rejected all day long.”

I´m sorry. I don´t mean to be negative. I don´t want to complain... I know it doesn´t help you guys at all. I know that it is the last thing you need to read. You deserve a 5 page letter saying “all is well, it´s ok, I´ve totally accepted and overcome Matt´s death, we are baptizing 3 families this Saturday and I lost 5 pounds from walking so much and eating such well-balanced meals prepared by the members!” That´s what you deserve to read. I know. I know. Complaining only makes things worse. I know, I know. I´m sorry. I´m trying to be happy, but my mind is swimming in confusion of knowing that the mission is quickly coming to a close.

One story that is a little more happy; we are super protected. The other day when we found our investigator drinking and smoking we were shielded from all danger. It was night, it was dark, they were all drunk, and yet I feared nothing. I literally have that invincible belief that most 18 year-old boys have. There are many times when I stop and think, “hey, I should be nervous about all this. We don´t know who these people are... etc.” And yet I think, “but I´m not scared.”

I know what will make me feel better:

I know the church is true! I know that Joseph Smith saw God the Father and Jesus Christ. I know he was called to be a prophet and restore the gospel. I know he received the Priesthood keys and that as a result, families can be together forever. The Book of Mormon is true. Jesus is the Christ. He is my Savior and Redeemer. Heavenly Father hears and answers prayers. We are never left alone. The gospel is the only way to find happiness. I have been called of God to preach His doctrine. I am a missionary of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I am fighting at His side and we will win. I know I will see my Savior again. I know that I will look into His eyes and worship at His feet. There is nothing that could stop me from persevering to the end. I will never give up, I will never quit. I will never surrender.

Of THIS I am sure!

Hermana Jensen

This too shall pass, and when it does, I will be a better, stronger Disciple of Christ for having made it through.

Take care, you are in my prayers!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lauren said...
I stumbled across your blog while looking for some more information about Matt. I didn't find out until a few days ago and it was too late for us to attend the memorial.

Matt served his mission in my home town. He taught my sister-in-law and her family and was such an amazing and dedicated missionary. He became good friends with my family and I've been able to see him a few times in Provo while we're at school here.

It was comforting to me to read your testimony. I'm sure you're doing a great job of teaching the gospel to those searching for it. Take care!
MAY 31, 2009 9:08 PM

The Musical Staff Shadow

5/19/09
Long letter....lots to read today!

The other day after a really tough day my companion stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and just started crying. As I tried to pat her back and help her calm down I looked at the fence where we had stopped. The streetlight where we were was shining on a bush and illuminated a shadow of a musical staff. Each leaf on the branches fell perfectly on the staff showing individually painted notes that varied from all kinds of intervals. I didn´t have time to jot it down, but I am sure that if I had sat down at a piano the notes that fell on the staff would have made a lovely melody. It was then that I realized that my companion and I needed to take advantage of the musical gifts the Lord had blessed us with. She has an angelic soprano voice and I can hold my own with the alto harmony. I told her that I felt that we needed to sing hymns in more of the lessons to invite the Spirit more powerfully. Of all the companions hips in the mission, I know that the Lord put us together to help others see and feel the Spirit. We decided to sing more and really try to invite the Spirit to each lesson. So far, it has helped us begin each lesson with more focus and we know the Spirit is with us.

Nata – an alfajor is the yummy treat I sent you… see the picture mom said she put on the blog last week. Way to go with FHE – you will be blessed.

Mom – the picture of Haedo (from last week’s post) is in my area… I have walked by that sign about 3500 times in the last 5 months. We live at 1406 ------ about 6 blocks from that sign you posted and about 4 blocks before the freeway. Good luck finding it on Google.

About phrases that I say throughout the day … when things blow up and go wrong I say “how much can one heart take?” – it is a lyric from a song about Emma Smith. Then I realize that I really don´t have it THAT hard. I also say “you´re gonna miss this” – a lot.

Ready for the best news I have received to date in the mission? Last Monday I got a letter from Sister Wilcox – one of my companions in LA – that I already knew from BYU… She said that after Orion Newell moved to Alaska to study – they forwarded the reference and her friends from her home ward invited him to dinner and apparently he kept receiving the Elders and was baptized in Alaska! It made me so happy I almost cried. Remember me writing about him? We found him tracting in Hollywood Hills my 3rd week in the mission. He was 20 – agnostic, but read the entire Book of Mormon in the month we taught him. He was my favorite of our investigators… and now he is one of my favorite converts--which means I need your help. I want to write him and congratulate him. The address I have is ----- that is all I know. His cell number back then was -----. Could you call him and say that you are Sister Jensen´s mom and that she wants to write you? Tell him Sister Wilcox wrote me and told me he was baptized. Then could you give me his complete address? I can´t wait to tell him how happy I am for him. Thanks – I simply could not wait 6 months to look him up myself.

Random story: people burn grass here. So there is quite often a smell of burning cut grass. It is interesting and always makes me stop and think, “what is that smell?”

Mom – the Relief Society here wants to know about the canning/sealing machine we use and what different food items we can. I was telling them about how efficiently we do food storage in the states and told them that you can get large cans of flour and other things. They want to know specifically if there is flour because it is the hardest to keep here the way they do it. Will you send me the low down about canning and how much it all is? Thanks on behalf of the Relief Society here in Haedo!


Challenge of the week: I feel that it is very, very important to write a personal history. For this purpose I challenge you all to write 2 pages every week explaining something monumental from your life (how you met your spouse, how you chose your career, the birth of you children, big injuries, sicknesses, successes, failures, trips… anything that would be interesting and would shed light on who you are. 2 pages a week about one specific thing… at the end of the year you will have an awesome personal history and your posterity will thank you for it. I cannot wait to start my own after the mission. I am going to write one story every week for the rest of my life – or at least until I run out of important things to tell about!

We stopped by and could only leave an English Book of Mormon with Santiago – instead of sitting down and really teaching him. It was late and he had to go to bed early for soccer practice in the morning. That morning I had written my testimony in the front of it in the most powerful way that my soul could muster. It is amazing, and a little bit sad, that I want soooo badly for him to accept this and let it guide his life. I always feel like that more for young people because I want them to have the gospel all their lives. But if I had such desire to preach to everybody like I have for the little Australian boy Santiago… I would be a much better missionary. I try to pray to have that desire for everybody.

We had a tough time getting ------ to church yesterday. We arrived at his house and really had to work to get him to go. He was saying that he wasn't going to go--but that he knew he needed to go. He eventually did decide to go with us and really liked it. Later he was mad at my companion because she was trying to cut to the chase of his 30 minute story and he felt offended. He called us that night crying and begging forgiveness. I think all this has to do with trying to quit drinking. Surely his body is going through serious withdrawal and he is suffering emotionally and a little bit psychologically. But he needs the gospel, and he needed to hear what we told him. He thanked us for pushing him. Sometimes you have to be a little bossy. Trust me-- we felt strongly that we knew what we were doing.

We have 2 others with baptismal dates, but before I can get too happy about it… it´s just that they were too easy and that almost always means that they won´t make it. When people just accept everything like this… it´s usually not the miracle you think it is. One is -------- who needs to quit smoking, but came to church on his own on Sunday. And the other is -------- who wasn´t there when we tried to pick him up for Church, but has 7 days sober of drinking and not smoking. He will be baptized next transfer (just after I leave) if things keep going this well. The other is a young girl named ------- who is just waiting for permission from her Dad – he said he´d let her when she turned 18 which is just after I leave… we´ll see if he signs the papers, but that would make 2 baptisms right after I leave. I know they still count and all, but it is still heartbreaking to not be there for them. It's like you need to see with your own eyes the proof that your labors are paying off. And you just want to be in the picture so bad. Laugh all you want, but it is true and it is real.

Question: is there any way to keep dirt from getting under your nails. The more I use a file to clean them, the more the dirt gets under there. I see no solution and my nails are just barely starting to grow again after 3 months of rebellion from my stress...… any ideas?

FYI: Here in Buenos Aires in the morning there is this fog that fills the air and it makes you feel like you live on the inside of one of those glass balls with the snow inside. Or it makes you feel like you live in a place with those fogged windows. It is cool. I took pictures this morning.

Why do they do that? Here in Argentina every Fall they literally cut all the branches off the trees. I´m not talking about simple pruning, I´m talking about massacring the poor tree and leaving it a stump and a bunch of fingers that reach to the sky but look terrible. I took pictures. Everybody destroys their trees right before Winter. They claim it makes them grow better and stronger in the spring but they don´t realize that they literally defame the beauty of the tree. Back home we are more concerned about the beauty of the landscape to half-kill our trees every Fall. This place now looks like a slaughtering yard for trees. It makes me sad.

It was so cold in our apartment and our heater was broken-- that I started heating our feet with my hairdryer in the morning as we studied. It was truly pathetic, but the Lord blessed us with a miracle the next day. A surprise apartment inspection, and when the Smith couple came they offered to DRIVE US to the store to buy a heater and bring us back. We accepted and we were able to buy 2 little heaters and I have slept great and studied better ever since. What a tender mercy… how cool is it to have a car to drive and buy the thing you need right when you need it? You have no idea. We were so cold. So cold.

Sorry you didn´t get the “estandarte” mailed to you – you won´t be getting it next transfer either… I´m not that good with the numbers anymore so you won't get the success papers but just know I am working hard every single day.

I have senioritis of this area. I´m screaming to get me out of here, but sad that I´ll barely miss the baptisms. I walk around way too comfortable… I need to go somewhere new and be confused again. It´s good for me to be lost and not know anything… you work differently when you know nobody and nothing.

We tried to wash the dishes of an investigator the other day and she yelled at us. The truth is that she was mad that her 19 and 15 year old daughters didn´t do them and she doesn´t want the guests who came for lunch to do their own dishes. It was really awkward and weird to be so seriously yelled at for simply trying to serve. Imagine that! So if for some reason I hesitate to wash the dishes after the mission you will know why… for 18 months we were literally forbidden to help out in the homes of the members and investigators… nobody lets us serve them… not even the members.

Mom – brace yourself… don’t take this wrong, but I have learned how to make an omelet even better than the omelets you make. It´s ok, I´ll teach you how it´s done. It is so amazing that you can learn something after cooking for so long and it´s like, “hey, why didn´t I ever try that?” You are going to love it!

Daddy – I´m glad you had a lovely 50th birthday spent quietly at home, but rest assured you will have a 50 yard line cake when I get back! I hope that the job scene is better when I get back and start searching… I never thought that I might be one of those people with a college degree that struggle to find a job. Let´s hope that doesn´t happen.

Jason – I bet you are already winning on the personal history thing. Way to go!

Wow how the hour goes by...

Love you tons, love the mission, love the cold, love the cough drops that I brought, love wearing ankle socks under my nylons, love my long warm coat,

Hermana Jensen!

p.s.

Thanks for the picture of daddy and the kangaroo... I was going to ask you to send it to me. You were inspired! I will print it and show it to Santiago today!

Wubba